Having problems in a relationship? What’s the difference between Soul Mates & Twin Souls?

As an energy worker and medium I am always looking at different types of relationships that are around me. With the work I do in my busy practice, I am always having to help people sort out their differences because at times we are only human and we can sure make life very complicated at times. Without love in our lives it is a lonely road as many of us have experienced.

There are two types of energies I have observed. The soul mate relationship and the twin soul. Here are two examples I have to give to help you understand how these energies affect us.


Soul mates have a different spiritual lineage to you. They come in to help you progress as a soul with your spiritual development. Once you have met your soul mate you usually have a very happy relationship based on trust, unconditional love and companionship. You both will harmonize and balance your energies and this will stimulate your growth as a spiritual being.

Susan and Mark have been married for almost 27 years and love each other deeply. While they are very different from one another, this seems to keep them together as they find it easy to communicate in a loving way, have great respect for each other’s space, know that they are there for each other, and although are often busy with their own interests they take the time to do things together. Their relationship is based on respect, love and honesty and they understand how important it is to give each other the space so that they can still grow. They have also learnt to help each other reach their highest potential and as souls, they are able to explore new and exciting realities. They also make the time to have date nights to keep their relationship exciting.


Twin souls, on the other hand, have a completely different relationship to this vibration. People who are interested in meeting their twin soul should be aware that these types of relationships could be turbulent because of patterns established during previous incarnations, which need to be resolved. Twin soul relationships are generally very difficult as there is too much friction and similarity between the two that causes spiritual growth to stagnate. At the same time, they can also be very healing because working through the conflicts can bring unconditional love, as this relationship is always full of so many lessons.

Isabella was an herbalist who was madly in love with Adam. They shared the same interests and loved each other passionately. Everything was fine except for Adam’s commitment issues. It started off with him not being able to sleep in the same bed as her because of an important job he had to go to the next day. He complained that her energy kept him awake so he couldn’t sleep properly. He also had no interests in her long-term friends or in having children and wanted nothing to do with the work she did but was constantly giving her advice on her business. It would take days to get over their terrible fights as both were so badly wounded that they found it difficult to trust each other. Each time this happened, Isabella became more and more despondent and began to realize that Adam had major issues he either could not or would not discuss with her. Adam, in turn, felt the same way and both of them were left frustrated and angry all the time, not able to make any type of commitment to each other. One minute Isabella would be loving and understanding and then she would withdraw from him and fly off the handle. In the end, because of their differences, they couldn’t live together but also couldn’t live without each other. They both loved each other passionately yet found it really difficult to work through the issues that were continually coming up for them. Unfortunately, they ended up moving away from each other and never saw each other again, until two years later they started up again and still to this day have the same problems.

No matter what way you look at it, in my opinion, twin soul relationships are difficult and can lead to domestic violence and abuse. If you are able to work out your differences and spiritual contracts, good luck. I have been in a twin soul relationship in my younger years and also found it difficult at the time as even though the love I felt was so intense. Most of the time I felt insecure, money went out the window, I was jealous as every single woman, including my close girlfriends, were constantly jumping on my man and it was hell on earth for the long two years we spent together.   The worst thing of all was as energy workers we both ended up being in some competition with myself having to work three jobs to pay all the bills.

One day, we had a moment of clarity, when we just looked at each other and said our life was like a constant climb up a very steep mountain, without safety gear. In the end after a drastic life changing experience, which involved the police, we were finally torn apart, went our own ways and our love for each other was split into a thousand tiny pieces.

Looking back, even though we loved each other dearly, nothing ever worked out in our favor making it just too hard to stay together. It broke my heart as I kept thinking and telling myself I could make it work over time, but the spirit world had other ideas and my intuition, that is never wrong, kept screaming at me a thousand times and kept telling me later I told you so.

Years later I visited an elderly and very wise psychic woman who, with a twinkle in her eye, finally gave me some clarity on my past relationship. I will always remember her face, which looked like a beautiful soft map with so many road lines of experience and it still brings tears of gratitude for the healing and wise words this earth angel gave me so freely.

She explained to me that I had been in a twin soul relationship and was pleased I had walked away. Once this was explained to me, I can’t tell you how relieved I felt as I had realized I did the right thing, even though it had taken years to get over.

These were her wise words  “If your amour isn’t made out of steel, run the other way before you get too involved, as a twin soul will take you down and destroy you.”